Category Archives: Grumpy Old Man!

A sign of me just getting grumpier and grumpier! I try to be an optimist most of the time, but just sometimes..I’m just grumpy!

May 31 2012

Virgin Atlantic – a lesson in English?

I blogged before about my lost luggage and the blind man in New York last month.

When I got back from the USA I sent of the receipts for some emergency stuff to Virgin with a fairly short letter suggesting they reimburse me without too much fuss. After all it wasn’t my fault – or was it?

This week I have received a cheque (thank you Mr Branson) but with it a letter which I have read and re-read to try and understand. I have decided that I don’t get it. I wonder if you could help me… I transcribe part of the letter exactly as it was written…

It’s my understanding that you have been informed the passenger who had your bag was visually impaired an therefore an operative assisted them with collecting their baggage, however they collected your bag in error on their behalf.

Taking this into account, I also searched for the report that would have been created when the other passenger’s bag was left behind, and Im afraid there is no mention of any assistance on their report.

Therefore I should explain that usually this is something we would not offer any reimbursement for.

We have however eager to finalise this matter for you, and as a gesture of goodwill, I am happy on this occasion to enclose a cheque for £x to cover the cost of expenses incurred whilst you were without your baggage.

I think I follow. It wasn’t really their fault because the blind man didn’t really lose his bag because he didn’t report it. And eager to finalise me, they’ll send me a cheque.

I don’t really care; I have been reimbursed. But the letter is gobbledygook. Why can’t they just say – yes it was our fault and here’s your money back. We’re really sorry.

Do I sound old by suggesting that English standards have dropped? I must qualify for the grumpy old man award of the day?

May 30 2012

Can supermarkets ever be sustainable?

I am the least green person I know – although I do go to London on the train and sometimes get out on my bike. But there ends my light touch on the planet.

A few months ago I was in a place called Biddulph. If you get the chance to go there, don’t. Wash your hair instead. It’s the sort of place NASA could use for training – you know – no atmosphere. It’s also difficult to get to. Especially from Nottingham.

I valued some property there. It wasn’t one of my high-value jobs. And I had a look around the place. I came across a Sainsbury’s superstore. It was green. Very green – solar panels, rainwater harvesting, high insulation and generally those things we do in buildings to lower the carbon footprint. All good stuff and the feel-good factor was high. There were even posters to tell me how good I should feel.

But here’s the thing – they’re not really sustainable are they? The only thing they sustain are their profits.

As I have wandered around various places over the last few weeks it is plain to see that we have lots of vacant shops. Too many.

But they did have a use once upon a time – as shops. They haven’t always been vacant. And despite Mary Portas not wanting to apportion blame – the blame almost certainly lies at the door of the supermarkets. These monster (green) stores are built and they are like death stars – they suck the lifeblood out of everything around. Although Tesco have now announced an end to their big box concept the damage has been done.

It is not sustainable to build a supermarket which then shuts down all the local shops around it.

One of the biggest issues we face in reducing carbon footprint is the existing building stock. And buildings which are vacant will not attract the investment required to get them to standard needed…It’s a double whammy!

May 28 2012

Eurotrash – rather predictable

I missed the Eurovision Song ‘contest’ at the weekend. Deliberately. I would rather stick pins in my eyes than watch this wholly biased and tedious contest. The result is fairly predictable. I don’t mean I know who will win. I mean I know we won’t.

Why did we feel that a 76 year old ‘has-been’ would appeal to the nations of Europe? Then again, why did Ireland think that the two irritants known as Jedward would either? We are not destined to win this shambles. Europe doesn’t like us. They like each other. They vote for each other. They have to prop one another up too financially. Since when do Greece beat anyone else in Europe (they came 17th – which they must be delighted with – off a budget of 1 euro).

We last won in 1997 when Katrina and the Waves didn’t sing their best song (Walking on Sunshine). Englebert’s claim to fame was he kept the Beatles off the number one spot 52 years ago.

He (and therefore we) got 12 points apparently. Which gave us 25th place. Marginally better than Tooji from Norway who scraped 7 points and held bottom spot away from us.

The UK has some of the best music in the world – we all know that. We invented great music. We still invest great music – go to a festival this summer and see the talent on show. If you go to Europe they have rubbish music, they listen to the stuff we listened to in the 1980′s.They wouldn’t know great music if they tripped up on it!

So, I have an idea – let’s not play this silly contest again. Spare us letting Europe snub their noses at us. Drop out and let them all have their great big music love in together.

Alternatively – put up the Sex Pistols. Suggest they play ‘Pretty Vacant’. And stick two fingers up to them?

May 27 2012

An operation? – there’s an App for that!

Apple rule the world. That’s indisputable. I couldn’t do without my iPhone4 (and I can’t wait to get my grubby hands on an iphone5 – in November allegedly).

But as I drank my Costa coffee yesterday on my way to the office, someone had left the Daily Telegraph on my (usual) table. I nearly choked on my cappuccino.

An iPhone now is an essential part of a doctors toolkit. I’ll spare you the gory details (although you can read them here if you are so inclined) of the whole episode. But it seems that a Doctor in Croydon couldn’t get his big ceiling mounted light to work – so he used his iPhone torch app! To perform an examination!

The best bit of the story is that the light timed out and the nurse didn’t know how to to the finger swipe to get it back on again. Oh, the fun you could have with a pun on that – but I won’t!

Well done Apple, bet you never thought that App would be so useful.

May 25 2012

The Olympic Torch great sale

I struggled a little last week to note that some of the Olympic torch-bearers put their ‘prized’ torches up for sale on ebay. They were allowed to buy them apparently for £295 – and some spoof bids were made up to £150,000. They are ‘worth’ £495.

The torch bearers were nominated to carry the torch for their contribution to their communities. 8,000 bearers will take it through 1,019 cities, towns and villages, each one carrying it about 300 metres before using it to light the next torch. And then stick it on ebay? I’m not sure I can square the great community folks with a cash-in culture?

The Olympics haven’t set my world on fire. I am really struggling to get excited by the event. It seems to me that we have spent billions on an event which lasts but a few weeks and has sucked the funding out of the regions for the last few years. Apparently it’s all about ‘Legacy’.

The best thing I heard at the weekend was that the 100m is the least exciting event with 12 grown blokes running in East London – away from a bloke who has just fired a gun… Some say that’s not unusual!

But since you can’t beat ‘em I figure I probably am better joining ‘em. So, I have an idea again this week for a little money making. I am no longer selling ‘art’. I’m prepared to sell you an actual olympic flame. It’s the genuine thing – but just in a pocket size pack – you can enjoy it anywhere. The first bid over £100 I’ll take. And I’ll throw in the postage.

I’ll also throw in another 35 mini flame-makers for free… You can share them with your friends…

May 24 2012

The Emperors New Clothes

I accept I may be a bit of a Heathen when it comes to art. I struggle with some of the modern stuff – but I do like some things…

I can cope if the art is clever or makes you stop and think. But if someone has to give me a long and abstract explanation it’s probably lost on me. Actually, not probably – definitely.

So I won’t be off to the Hayward Gallery anytime soon. Especially as they want Eight quid of my hard-earned cash to view their latest ‘exhibition’. That’s because it is ‘invisible art’. The Press Release proudly announces that the punters can expect ‘plenty to see and experience’ and that it ‘would set our imaginations alight’. Well, without wishing to sound too cynical, it will have to.

There are a number of pieces of ‘art’ – Andy Warhol’s invisible sculpture – he allegedly once stepped on and off the plinth that remains. Also – more intriguingly the Tom Friedman blank piece of paper. Not entirely blank as he stared at it for 1000 hours over a five year period. Sounds like he really thought that through. On top of these two masterpieces there are 48 other wastes of space.

‘Art isn’t about material objects – it’s about setting our imaginations alight’, cooed the ultimate luvvee, Ralph Rugoff (no tittering at the back) Director of The Hayward.

Please someone pinch me and tell me I didn’t really hear this twaddle?

£8 to see nothing.

I can’t help but think that someone is laughing somewhere.

I wonder if they have ever heard the story of the Emperor’s New Clothes…

In the meantime if it is your idea of art and you have a spare million – I have an A4 sheet of paper on which i have drawn an imaginary line with my finger. It’s a classic. I can frame it if that helps. It’s similar to that shown above, but clearly better…

May 23 2012

Will HS2 happen for Nottingham?

I blogged before about the HighSpeed2 Train line and my view that it was critical for Nottingham. Shorter train journeys to London must be of benefit to us.

Transport Secretary Justine Greening announced the controversial HS2 high-speed rail project was approved earlier in the year. Well, the first phase was. This was the line from London to Birmingham. The second phase will then form a ‘Y’ shape and he’d from Birmingham to Leeds. There has been a lobby for a stop in Nottingham.

Or more precisely between Nottingham and Derby – close to the motorway and somewhere near the end of the tram line. All roads point to Toton? It’s a logical place, unless you support the East Midlands Parkway Station on the A453.

Recommendations to ministers about this future extension should be made to ministers by the end of the year. So we have some time to wait for the outcome.

But I have it on good authority that Nottingham may not now benefit. I have been told that the line may well go to the west of Derby. There is current infrastructure there and the right noises are not being made to the Government. It was suggested to me that HS2 might get a spur at a later date to Nottingham.

This would be disastrous in my view. You cannot get an official response as the whole project is shrouded in mystery and secrets. But there seems to be a slightly different mood in the City. It will be a real headache if the line doesn’t benefit us at the first cut. We need to up the campaign!!

I will do a little digging to see what I can find out…

May 21 2012

Part time job going anyone?

It seems that the best place to get a part time job is the Civil Service. With an amazing flexitime work pattern it sounds as though some people can work enough lunches and until that late hour of 6pm to work 9-day fortnights! Up to three days a month can be taken off if there is sufficient credit built up.

Not only can they build up hours but if they get stuck in traffic or trains run late this ‘time’ counts as ‘working’.

Civil Servants have already taken strike action over their pension arrangements. It seems that the Government proposals to change their work practices are opposed – I can’t imagine why!

So whilst all these fun and games go on, William Hague, the Foreign Secretary, said companies should “work harder” to help boost the economic recovery.

I sometimes wonder how out of touch these people are. Have they any idea about the hours worked in the private sector. It’s not just in my office, but several of my friends work 12 hour days. I always thought I would work less if I were a Junior Doctor! I’m not complaining – but I find it hard to understand how people can be so lazy.

I knew someone who worked for a local Authority who routinely worked a system of his 5 weeks holiday plus four weeks sick leave and 12 ‘Duvet Days’. In addition he worked flexitime too – so earned those extra few days off a month after slogging away… The Sick pay was regarded as ‘holiday entitlement’. I’m not sure it still exists, but it certainly did.

The review of these sort of practices can’t wait. As unemployment rises we can’t have tens of thousands of people working half shifts and expecting to be paid handsomely.

One of my first bosses had a great answer for people who asked for a job description – simple he would say, “Do what it takes”…

May 20 2012

The Facebook – Boom and Bust?

So Mark Zuckerberg is rich beyond Greece’s wildest dreams. An 8 year old Company gets to be ‘worth’ £63bn, taking the creator Zuckerberg into the rich list with a $21bn stake.

So whilst Greece scraps around for some pennies for the milk bill Zukerberg can buy a new hoodie without so much as blinking.

But I can’t but help wonder how long the euphoria will last. Generally speaking companies need to create revenue to prop up profit and thus dividends for those shareholders. It was interesting yesterday that the share price went from $37 to $45 but then slipped back to the starting price.

I don’t use Facebook a lot. The squash team I am part of do have a private page where we post rude messages about each other and look for games, sort fixtures and teams for forthcoming matches. The rest of Facebook is accidental stuff for me. I see people I know – occasionally press ‘like’ but rarely engage in long conversations.I put a few pictures up, but that’s like the worst eight words in the English language – “Would you like to see my holiday photographs”?

But I never click on the adverts. Nor do I pay for my Facebook experience. Nor would I. In fact occasionally I have considered shutting it down. If it weren’t for the squash stuff, I probably would….

So where is the rich revenue stream? Is it just me who wants my user experience for free? Presumably someone is paying Facebook Inc. some cash somewhere? But are the results measurable? I guess they must be.

But I can’t help but wonder if Zuckerberg sold at the right time. And that the only way is down?

May 19 2012

Battersea as a football stadium?

I was in London this week and was interested to note that Chelsea Football Club are bidding to buy the iconic Battersea Power Station. I passed the building a number of times as I criss-crossed London.

The building isn’t pretty – but can be seen for miles around. The four chimneys and rather brutalist architecture make quite a statement on the London skyline. It’s a bit of a ‘marmite’ building. Some love it and some hate it. I quite like it. It last produced power in 1983!

And so it seems that the proposal by Chelsea to create a ‘Stamford Bridge II” has also divided opinion. Although I can see that the football club could create an instantly recognisable ground, I am not sue that it would work. I think the designers will have to demolish too much of the structure to make a stadium work. This seems a pity, although finding another use might be rather elusive.

I gather that Boris Johnson must give consent and that he may not be behind the proposal.

There was talk that the former power station should have been Tate modern. I think that sort of use sits much more comfortably than a football stadium…