This isn’t a rant about people peeing in car parks, but about the psychology of space(!)

Girls may not realise this (and this may be the fundamental problem here) that if a boy goes into a urninal there are some unwritten but very clear rules about your place. If there are a bank (is that the collective noun?) of urinals and there are boys already present you must be very careful about where you take your place. You must never (never ever) stand next to someone else.

Nor must you start a conversation if you do not know the person. There is a certain etiquette – which we were all born with. We just know.

So why then does this not follow through into a car park. I generally try to avoid parking next to someone else when there are three hundred other spaces available. But invariably I come back to my car to find another – not just parked next to me, but physically trying to mate with my car. But more irritating is that they always park on the drivers side of me – thus rendering me into a human contortionist to get back into the drivers seat.

This is not difficult stuff.

I once asked someone very politely why they had parked right next to me when there were two hundred other spaces. I was told firmly that he could park where he wanted to. That wasn’t my point – I already knew that. I just wondered why it had to be right there?

Perhaps we need to educate all on the etiquette of urinals and apply that to car parks?